Because I’m going to need it. Yep, it’s happening. Soon. My 5-year plan is ahead of schedule and I’ll be hitting the road. I know choosing RV life may seem like a mid-life crisis or Instagram hashtag-triggered event but it’s been a long time coming. I’ve always wanted to be everywhere.

When I was 16 I wanted to live in Jamaica before I ever traveled there (which I still haven’t).

After high school all I wanted was to travel across the country.

I then followed boyfriends to Atlanta, Delaware, and Florida, just to get away but I always got sucked back to Baltimore (breakups and having no money do that to a young person).

I also wanted to live in Tulum.

Then Puerto Vallarta, even more than Tulum.

Then it was Cuba.

And then once again my focus shifted back to Mexico, with no specific location in mind, the country just calls to me.

^{finally putting her plans into motion}

When people ask me where I’m from I say Chicago, unless I’m traveling out of state then I say Baltimore but Baltimore never felt like home. After living here twice as long now as Chicago, saying Chicago no longer feels right either. My family didn’t move around much, but the timing of those moves felt pivotable (and at the time very damaging) to my development. I moved right before 6th grade when I was one of the most popular kids in 5th grade, or as popular as a 5th grader voted class president can be. Going from all that attention to being a nobody in a new school among middle school mean girls (and boys) wasn’t a good time. I eventually found my group but just as I was growing into myself, feeling a part of something, taking my volleyball skills to the next level, my parents moved me from the Chicago suburbs to Bel Air, Maryland. Have you heard of it? Yeah, exactly.

^{I was born for the road}

Being a drastic difference would be an understatement. I’ve never felt like more of an alien walking into Bel Air High School and the feeling was mutual because everyone looked at me like I was from a different planet. Me showing up in my vibrant 90s patterned Merry-Go-Round clothing, LA Kings starter jacket, and MJ-inspired Air Jordans amongst a sea of khaki and plaid button-downs and striped polos. This is when I learned the true meaning of preppy and first heard the words LL Bean and J. Crew.  J. Crew grew on me but I still can’t wrap my head around the appeal of LL Bean and those stupid brown shoes. I hated every day and let my parents know they ruined my life, and my promising volleyball scholarship, for a good 6 months. I once asked someone at school where all the black and Latino (pre-Latinx days) people were and they pointed to a small group of people in the corner. I thought they were joking, they can all fit into one group in a corner? I didn’t know places so un-diverse existed. It wasn’t until 3 years later I stopped wanting to run back to Chicago but still wasn’t happy about being here. Eventually, years later, me now well into my 30s, my parents ended up ditching me in Baltimore to go back to Chicago, the nerve.

After the moves with boyfriends and breakups I met my soon-to-be husband, now ex, and had my own kid, I felt like Baltimore was now my home by default. As much as I wanted to move, I didn’t want to uproot my kid knowing how difficult it was for me.  My entire life, still to this day, I’ve floated in and out of different friend groups, always feeling a little bit on the outside. I never had the deeply rooted history in this place or among these people like they did. My son is now nearing 18 and his own legal independence and I, a single remote worker with no immediate blood family here other than my ex and his mom (whom I still very much consider my family) I’ll be free to roam. For the first time ever, I’ll be able to move where and when I want without having to uproot anyone but the question of where I want to go looms overhead. How am I supposed to decide?

.

^{wherever the road may lead}

My kid plans to move out of state, whether it’s for college or his desire to get out of Baltimore too, we aren’t exactly sure where he’ll end up or how long he’ll stay in one place. He tossed around ideas of PNW and Canada, “somewhere the average temperature is like 40 degrees” whereas I’m seeking 70s and above. Even being my flesh and blood, we’re just built differently. So while he can go his way and I can go mine, this mama bird never wants him to be too out of reach and for too long. With my home on wheels, I can take up residence somewhere warm but I can “move” when and where, even if it’s to follow him into Canada. In the summertime of course. I can visit him for extended periods of time but give him his personal space to not overstay my welcome. Sometimes a mom just wants to know their kids are close.

^{my oldest sister’s little camper, she inspired me to take action on my dream}

I know dragging an RV across the country isn’t as quick and easy as hopping on a plane, which I can still do for more urgent matters, but I’m able to uproot everything on fairly short notice easily. This is not my lifelong plan, a few years at most I’m guessing, and hopefully, I’ll then be leaving the country. My basecamp will be near my sister, dad, as well as my other sister’s camper with its yearly plot. We also plan to take RV road trips in unison. At least my 3rd sister will only have to choose one place to visit to get all 3 of us. It wouldn’t be my life if I wasn’t also working on convincing the ex-husband and his mom to relocate to Florida with me, something my MIL always wanted to do anyway. My ex has no ties to Baltimore either and there are no rules against being one big happy traveling circus. Maybe those childhood moves weren’t so damaging after all, would I have the same sense of wanderlust and prioritize traveling if I had stayed in the same place my entire life? Who knows, maybe I’ll stumble upon a little town I never knew existed and finally feel like I’m home.